Trigger-happy

The Russian government demanded today that Britain close all Russian Offices of the British Council – a UK government-run cultural outreach and language instruction organization. The pretext was typically lame, contrived and, in fact, non-sensical – that the Council, registered as a non-profit in the UK, has no diplomatic standing because it is a for-profit organization (e.g. they charge fees for their services). This is so infuriatingly Russian – no, Soviet – on so many levels, that it makes me want to drink a shot of vodka (and I don't drink vodka).

First of all, it is patently obvious that the demand is a salvo in the battle over the extradition of Andrei Lugovoi, whom the British accuse of murdering Alexander Litvinenko, a Putin critic living in London at the time of his death from radiation poisoning. But that is actually the least Russian aspect of the deal – many countries resort to this kind of childishness in diplomatic disputes.

Everything else is pure KGB. First, it makes no logical sense -- you have no diplomatic standing, therefore you must close. Well, how about other kinds of standing? Did they go on vacation all of a sudden? Then, the very demand to shut down. “Ve vill kill you if you don't do az ve say.” Shoot now, ask questions later. The Washington Post thinks it's unclear how the Russians will enforce the order to close down if the British defy it. I think it's very clear – they will send in the infamous “tax police” with flak jackets and assault rifles. They've done it to Russian non-profits a million times, why not to a foreign one? I bet they'd haul the staff off to jail, too, if the members are not too highly-placed in the British diplomatic circles. In most other governments, someone reasonable enough to see this as an opportunity would step up to the plate. “We'd like to do all we can to help you remain open, but there is this pesky question of the fees you charge. Our, ahem, law requires us to do likewise – could we arrange, how do we say this, a profit-sharing agreement of some sort?” But not the Russians. Blast the whole thing to shreds; who cares about money! Ah, never mind -- it's not about the money anyway.

Finally, there is the target. The British Council does essentially educational and entertainment kinds of things – language classes, movies, lectures. Do I smell the old cocktail of equal parts information control, jingoism and xenophobia? The last thing the Soviet government wanted its citizens to do was to learn about Western countries, their culture and their way of life from natives of those countries, in other words, to learn the truth. So anything even remotely cultural and educational would always be the first on the list of targets for elimination. Welcome back to the 1970s, Russian-style.